Childhood Trauma Explained
Attachment Trauma—At a Glance
Attachment trauma is a relational injury that develops in childhood when a caregiver (like a parent) is emotionally unavailable, unpredictable, neglectful, or frightening, disrupting the child’s sense of safety and connection (Zagaria, 2024). It often begins before language develops and may include pre-verbal trauma where emotional pain is stored in the body and nervous system rather than conscious memory (Lahousen, 2019). Research shows it can affect emotional regulation, self-worth, and adult relationships and may continue across generations if unaddressed (Yehuda, 2018). Attachment trauma is common among adults who feel emotionally numb, overwhelmed, anxious in relationships, or fearful of abandonment—even when no obvious abuse occurred (Dagan, 2022). It is increasingly recognized in clinical trauma work worldwide and also in Dubai as an important factor in mental health and relational well-being.
Attachment Trauma: A Relational Injury That Can Begin Before Words
Attachment trauma is a relational injury that begins early in life. These injuries happen when care is inconsistent, frightening, or emotionally unavailable. It can imprint the nervous system and shape how we relate to ourselves and others.
Attachment trauma is not caused by the child; it is something that happens to the child within a caregiving relationship. When caregivers are unpredictable, emotionally absent, or frightening, the child’s developing attachment system adapts to survive, often at the cost of ease with closeness, trust, and self-worth 1, 2.
How early can attachment injuries begin?
Attachment patterns begin forming in the first months of life when the early life of the child has not been met with nervous-system attunement (Lahousen et al., 2019; Feldman, 2017). Sensitive caregiving is protective for a child’s healthy emotional development across many studies studies (De Wolff and van IJzendoorn, 1997).
What is pre-verbal trauma?
Pre-verbal trauma is a sensory and somatic imprint from exposure to adversities before the development of any language.
When there are no words, the adverse impacts are stored primarily as sensations, affects, and survival responses rather than a story, words, or a memory (Lahousen et al., 2019).
Symptoms may be confusion, chronic anxiety, or freeze states; feeling unsafe without knowing why; separation anxiety; being triggered by closeness or abandonment; and deep fear of emotional intimacy.
This is why people often say, “Nothing really bad happened to me growing up, but I still feel no sense of belonging or disconnected.” The body remembers what the mind cannot.
How do attachment injuries manifest?
Relationships
- Fear of rejection/abandonment, reassurance seeking (anxious patterns)
- Emotional distance or discomfort with intimacy (avoidant patterns)
- Mixed, shifting strategies under stress (disorganized patterns) (Dagan and Ford, 2022; Farina et al., 2019).
Emotions & Self-Concept
- Shame, self-blame, chronic loneliness or numbness
- Trigger-driven reactions that feel out of proportion to the moment (Farina et al., 2019).
Nervous System & Dissociation
- Fight/flight/freeze/fawn responses, startle, hypervigilance
- Dissociation or “zoning out,” especially under relational stress (Sroufe, 2005; Sroufe, 2010).
Does it begin only in my own lifetime?
Attachment trauma can have intergenerational roots. If our caregivers’ trauma histories shape their behavior and impact their ways of parenting, this gets passed on to us as an inherited burden (Yehuda and Lehrner, 2018; Bowers and Yehuda, 2016). By working on yourself, this is a gift that you offer your future generations.
How can I heal from attachment trauma?
Healing is possible across the lifespan because of the brain’s neuroplasticity. Effective routes include attachment-focused psychotherapy like Internal Family Systems (IFS). Other trauma therapies (EMDR) that reduce reactivity and integrate implicit memory.
Frequently Asked Questions About Attachment Trauma
Is attachment trauma the same as childhood trauma?
No. Attachment trauma is specifically a relational injury within the child–caregiver bond. It may involve emotional neglect, misattunement, or inconsistent caregiving, even when no obvious abuse occurred.
How do I know if I have attachment trauma as an adult?
Common signs include fear of abandonment, emotional shutdown, people-pleasing, mistrust, difficulty with closeness, low self-worth, and chronic anxiety in relationships.
Can attachment trauma be healed later in life?
Yes. Adults can develop “earned security” through safe relational experiences and trauma-focused therapy (Maciel, 2023).
What therapy helps with attachment trauma?
Evidence-informed approaches include Internal Family Systems (IFS), EMDR, attachment-focused psychotherapy, and somatic therapies that support nervous-system regulation.
Is attachment trauma connected to anxiety or relationship problems?
Yes. Early adaptations to relational stress can drive ongoing anxiety, conflict cycles, codependency, emotional avoidance, or fear of intimacy.
What causes attachment trauma?
Emotional unavailability, chronic criticism, inconsistent caregiving, parental mental illness or addiction, divorce, medical separation at birth, or persistent emotional loneliness—even in otherwise “good” homes.
Is it always caused by parents?
Not intentionally. Caregivers may carry unhealed trauma, mental health struggles, or cultural pressures that limit emotional availability. Intergenerational transmission is documented (Yehuda, 2018).
Can attachment trauma exist without childhood memories?
Yes. Many injuries occur preverbally and are stored as body responses and emotional patterns rather than explicit memories (Lahousen, 2019).
Is online therapy effective for attachment trauma?
Yes. With a safe therapeutic alliance, online therapy can support attachment repair and regulation—helpful for expats and those with demanding schedules in Dubai.
How long does healing take?
Timelines vary. Many notice meaningful change in 8–12 trauma-focused sessions, with deeper transformation over time.
Do you offer attachment trauma therapy in Dubai?
Yes. I offer trauma-informed psychotherapy in Dubai, integrating IFS, EMDR, and relational therapy. See IFS Therapy and EMDR Therapy.
About Dr. Millia
Dr. Millia is a trained trauma specialist with over 25 years of clinical experience in psychiatry and psychotherapy. She trained in the UK’s NHS system and served the NHS in various leadership roles.
She is a former EMDR Europe Approved Consultant, EMDR researcher, and board member of the EMDR Association UK. She is now a member of the EMDR International Association (EMDRIA).
Dr. Millia is also a Level 3 Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapist, bringing a compassionate, parts-informed approach to her work with clients in Dubai.
📞 Contact Dr. Millia
If you would like to book a consultation or learn more about services, please get in touch:
- Clinic: First Psychiatry Clinic
- Address: 975 Al Wasl Road, Dubai, UAE
- Phone: +971 55 355 7855
- Email: info@milliabegum.ae
- Website: milliabegum.ae
📍 Location & Opening Hours
Opening hours
- Monday: 09:00 – 18:00
- Tuesday: 09:00–18:00
- Wednesday: 09:00–18:00
- Thursday: 09:00–18:00
- Friday: 09:00–18:00
- Saturday: 09:00–18:00
- Sunday: 09:00–18:00